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Author Archives: Teresa Carey

Want More Influence and Power? Give Up Control

Posted on July 24, 2018

…Jesus, Gandhi, and Martin Luther King Jr. were great leaders. They had control of virtually no one, yet their influence changed the course of history.

Michael Hyatt, Former CEO – Thomas Nelson Publishers

We all know the feeling. It’s the gut-felt twinge of impending loss. It’s the fear associated with giving up a person or group, handing over a project and forfeiting a decision within our span of control. It’s often a familiar scene as we watch other leaders, and sometimes even see ourselves, slip into the sinkhole of control.

Do You Want Influence or Control?

Influence leadershipWhat most leaders really want is to influence others, which is earned from power. We want to be empowered and to empower others. Often this journey is filled with the temptation to keep or take control of any number of situations within our line of sight. However, grabbing more control doesn’t pave the road to power, and here’s why.

The need for control is born from insecurity and fear. When a leader’s source of energy is based on fear of loss, it’s about the leaders’ needs – not what is best for others or the organization. To fill this inner void, leaders strive to have more meetings, larger teams, a different reporting relationship, or more decision rights – at their gain yet at the expense of others. This is a myth because you can’t truly control anyone but yourself.

The more we attempt to increase our control, the more resistance we receive. Many of us have felt this as parents. As often said in sales circles, “People don’t like to be sold, they like to buy.” Whether in a personal or professional realm, trying to force control over an area or person produces the opposite of the desired effect. Potential allies and champions can become undesired adversaries.

Control is situational. It’s a reaction to drive a specific behavior or outcome. One issue at a time, a controlling leader works to manipulate the desired result. Power is pervasive. It transcends having to micro-manage or achieve a one and done motive. However, when a leader has earned the right to influence, the impact is predetermined at a visionary level. There’s a strategic and cultural stickiness that seldom wavers.

Gaining Influence

Do you see yourself in any of the above descriptions? Would having more influence up your leadership quotient? These three steps will start you on your way:

1-     Focus on improving yourself. Recognize the best and most influential leaders are vulnerable and engage in development and career long learning practices. Modeling at this level demonstrates a depth of humility to others that is attractive and alluring.

2-     Nurture all relationships, not just the ones perceived to advance control. Often there is a misallocation of effort as an attempt to gain the favor of only the top leaders.  Genuine interaction with others across the entire organization is crucial. Focusing on helping others at all levels get what they want will lead to the ability to influence others.

3-     Believe in and practice the law of abundance. Let go by trusting there is enough for everyone– enough work, enough recognition and enough room at the table for power and influence. The supply is ample and available to those who are wise enough to give up control to gain it.

In order to have influence, you have to be willing to be influenced.
Stephen Covey

A Leader’s Greatest Single Act of Omission

Posted on May 22, 2018

Unarguably, talent is the trump card for businesses in today’s economy. According to a study by ManpowerGroup, an international research and advisory firm, 38 percent of global companies say they are having difficulty filling their open positions, the highest such figure since 2007 (Talent Economy: February 12, 2016).

This void can create a reduced ability to serve clients while impacting competitiveness, productivity and ultimately revenue. Replacing an employee who quits costs, on average, 21 percent of their pay (HBR.org: March 2017). The war for talent is real and more pervasive than ever.

What can companies do to retain their top performers?

Leadership consistent feedbackOne simple and free act can be a difference-maker in whether someone chooses to stay or leave – and, it’s not the pay, promotions or the perks necessarily. We can stop worrying about the color of the sweatshirt, the amount of the gift card and the style of the coffee mugs. In Fortune’s annual study of the 100 Best Places to Work, some of the comments from employees who were surveyed communicate clearly that staying is about knowing, “my work has special meaning”, “I make a difference here,” and confidently stating, “When I look at what we accomplish, I feel a sense of pride.” (Fortune: March 14, 2016)

There’s only one thing standing in the way of employees knowing the impact of their work – your consistent feedback as a manager and leader.

Employee FeedbackAs I work with current and emerging leaders in pre-rapid growth organizations, this is a recurring theme in many of my meetings. Leaders aren’t giving regular, ongoing feedback to their team members. Or, the leaders themselves are craving kudos or thanks for extra effort or even keeping the wheels on the bus during fast-paced growth periods. Team members simply want feedback – good or bad – to get a sense of where they are and how they need to improve to get to the next level of improved performance.

Why isn’t it happening more frequently?

1-     There’s a misconception that the annual review is for feedback, and the generosity of a mid-year review provides plenty of additional opportunity for this exchange. Why provide more? Unless of course there’s a big problem or mistake, then the team member can take a trip to the proverbial woodshed. Here they finally get attention and learn about the error or behavior which may have been prevented if there had been regular communication.

2-     Many leaders use the excuse of “busyness” as a reason for lack of immediate feedback, weekly or bi-weekly meetings. It’s a daily sprint during the rapid growth phase. So, just getting the work done is often the order of the day. Attending to the essence of leadership, which happens to be leading and developing others, takes a backseat.

3-     The leader feels it’s HR’s job or the coach’s role to fix an issue or recognize excellence. Change happens most frequently when there are multiple and reinforcing feedback points. HR and the coach only know about what is reported, while the leader knows about the behavior sooner and typically firsthand, allowing for more immediate feedback to correct or compliment.

The most effective leaders make their people a priority.

Servant leadership involves the sacrifice of time and energy to make others successful.  If you’re not investing time in your people, this may be a good opportunity to revisit what’s most important in the role of leadership.  What are you omitting that you should start committing to?

Do you want to start committing time to feedback but don’t know how?

1-     First, recognize and commit to what the role of leadership embodies. People can’t perform to the highest level of expectations if those aren’t communicated and feedback on them isn’t delivered on a regular basis.

2-     Set up regular meetings and respect the other person enough to HONOR them and the time – weekly, bi-weekly or monthly depending on the tenure and need for communication for each team member. Nothing says, “You’re not important to me,” like forfeiting time or constantly cancelling meetings with them.

3-     Balance the feedback by using a positive-negative-positive approach. The goal is to build up, not tear down.

4-     Make sure it’s a dialog. By asking the person their thoughts on a specific situation or performance first, you can set the stage for a conversation, not an oration.

5-     Put yourself in the other person’s shoes. Reflect on when you were at the same stage in your career. What was most needed? Most likely you’ll arrive at the answer of communication and feedback.

Simply put, “We all need people who will give us feedback. That’s how we improve.” – Bill Gates

BRAVO for Brevity

Posted on April 24, 2018

brevity time keepingThirty minutes into a 10 minute agenda item, boredom and frustration kicked in mightily among the group. The presenter had been told she had a maximum of 10 minutes for a “brief summary overview” of a project. This person was seasoned, and smart, so she had to know the word brief meant “of short duration.”  The words summary and overview were also strong clues. Yet at 3 times the allotted limit, she was still going.

What went wrong?

This isn’t an unfamiliar or uncommon scenario to many of us and it happens more than it should. How does someone miss the cue card for staying within the given time for a presentation, a meeting or even an impromptu, “do you have a couple minutes?” office drive-by?

There are a few main reasons this happens:

1-    The person isn’t thinking about the limit and the rest of the agenda, only what they need to communicate on their behalf to make their point;

2-    They haven’t prepared to deliver a succinct and clear message, so they end up wasting words and time;

3-    There isn’t a meeting facilitator or leader who is willing to take the reins back and regain control of the meeting and situation.

What’s the worst thing that can happen? Plenty.

·         If it’s a habit for certain individuals to always go over, others may start to question his or her ability to manage and steward their own time;

·         It may send a signal they don’t respect everyone else’s time;

·         Others may stop engaging with the individual because they know they’re signing up for a larger time sacrifice than is available or necessary to discuss even a quick question;

·         If every meeting goes an average of 15 minutes over, and the average executive spends 23 hours per week in meetings, that’s almost a 6-hour waste. (HBR, August 2017) The greatest opportunity costs for leaders occur for deep thinking and completing actual work, according to a study by Steven Rogelberg and his team at The University of N.C.;

·         After one hour in a meeting, half of the attendees have checked out, missing pertinent information (meetingking.com).

brevity less is moreHow can we all become better at being brief?

·         Plan what you’re going to say ahead of time – always.  What’s the one key take away you want others to have? How can you get them there in two to three points? Hit the headlines. If people want more information, they’ll ask for it.

·         Practice so you know how much time you’re going to take. Mark Twain said it best, “It takes at least three weeks just to prepare a good ad lib speech.” Even if it’s not a power presentation but rather a small portion of a meeting, the rule of practicing still applies. If you try to “wing it”, those wings will take you someplace you don’t need to go.

·         Remind yourself that time is a finite resource. Whether it’s two people or 20, everyone in the room has multiple priorities. Yours, and the rest of those, must fit into their mental bandwidth. Be memorable by mastering making your point in as little time as possible vs. being the one who sucked the air out of the room. Less truly is more.

“Be sincere. Be brief. Be seated.”  Franklin D. Roosevelt – BRAVO, F.D.R.

The Quest to Ask More Questions

Posted on April 10, 2018

“If I had an hour to solve a problem and my life depended on the solution, I would spend the first 55 minutes determining the question – for once I know the question, I could solve the problem in 5 minutes.”  Albert Einstein

Ask more questionsWe don’t have to be Einstein to know the importance of asking the right questions. The late Stephen Covey, in his work, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, pointed out the lesson by reminding us, “seek first to understand, then to be understood.”  Eric Schmidt, the former CEO of Google responsible for leading the build-out of their infrastructure for rapid growth, proclaimed, “We run this company on questions, not answers.”

Ask More Questions

The more questions we ask, the more we increase our likelihood of finding better answers. The better our answers, the smarter we can become. Most of us have spent at least some time with 4 and 5 year olds, and it’s no surprise they spend much of their time asking questions. A recent study in the UK found the average parent answers 23 questions per hour (testingmom.com).

Admittedly, that ratio may be a bit zealous for most of us as working professionals (sans auditors, attorneys and other research/information-dependent professionals). However, we could all do ourselves and our organizations a favor by going on a quest to stir up more curiosity. In a rapid-growth organization, it’s a necessity. Here are a few reasons why:

·         CREATIVITY AND INNOVATION are core competencies for leaders in dynamic and fast-paced organizations. Want to be more innovative? Ask more questions.

Questioning is the hallmark of an innovative problem-solver.  Sir Isaac Newton first asked the simple question, “What makes an apple fall straight down from a tree?” before he could begin to explain the law of gravity.

·         HEALTHY CONFLICT MANAGEMENT is a key success measure of high performing teams (Lencioni, The Five Dysfunctions, 2002).

Pressure and the accompanying stress can be rampant in launching a platform, working on a client resolution, or capturing a new deal. The most effective leaders and team members ask more questions to understand each other and the situation, build trust and navigate disagreement in achieving a collaborative state.

Ask more questions·         ACTIVE LISTENING is one of the four key identifiers of high emotional intelligence (Inc., May 2017).

In 1995, Goleman debuted the concept of EI in his work appropriately titled, Emotional Intelligence. Increasingly, emotional intelligence behaviors are being sought as companies look for these markers in world-class leaders. Great leaders discerningly ask enough of the right questions, then listen to get to the heart of the solution.

Here’s the first question: How can we all start today?

Overcome assumptions.
We need to get out of our own way and open our minds to new possibilities. Everything around us is changing – the problems have changed, so the answers will change.

Dispel the myth.
Contrary to what some believe, asking questions makes us look smarter and stronger, not uninformed or weak.

Slow down.
In the rush to get to market or implement quickly, taking the time to ask critical questions is often overlooked. This results in a slower launch or a re-do on many execution-based items.

Have a problem to solve? Then go on the quest to ask more questions to get the answers needed to create and sustain growth.

Just Do What You Say You Will Do

Posted on March 20, 2018

Following through – whether in hockey, basketball, baseball, golf or any number of other sports – results in lift, accuracy and power. It guarantees the very best attempt and outcome after contact with the puck or ball. Strong follow through demonstrates reliability.

Follow up and Follow ThroughThis concept can also translate to professional and working relationships. Is anyone else noticing that follow through and follow up are increasingly becoming amiss? What’s causing this? Are certain individuals prone to the pattern based on their situation or style?

None of us are perfect. Any one of us can occasionally drop the ball. Yet a continued pattern of a lack of follow through can send all the wrong signals, damaging our personal brand and reputation.

The most respected and effective leaders DWTSTWY –
Do What They Say They Will Do.

In a recent 10-year study by Harvard on “CEO-Sprinters”, those who get to the top faster, consistently demonstrate the behavior of reliability (Botelho, Powell and Wong, 2018).  Each day, they work hard just to keep their promises. Those who didn’t make it to the top in the study weren’t reliable with follow through.

The following examples may present just a few all too familiar scenarios:

  • A colleague reschedules meetings at the last minute, and their pattern is predictable.
  • You send an email at someone’s request or go above and beyond to provide a requested resource or answer. They don’t even respond. There’s no “Thank you!” or, even, “This stinks.”
  • You’ve given business to an organization, you send an email to several leaders for the potential of doing more business with them, and no one follows up. This one is a real head scratcher.

Do you want to be better at follow through?

Set reasonable boundaries for yourself – know what you can and can’t do. What’s realistic for your schedule? I get lots of requests for networking or informational meetings. As much as I would like to meet with everyone, it’s practically impossible if I’m going to serve my clients in the way they deserve, love on my family and leave a bit of space for myself. One give back meeting per month is all I can realistically handle. So, I tell them, “I’m not able to give you the time and full presence you deserve right now.” The answer can be “no”, or “not now.” You have a choice.

Follow upAggressively use and honor your calendar. Have you promised someone you would follow up next month? Put it on your calendar right then. We’re all wired continuously, so there are no excuses.

Recognize the impact on your brand or reputation if there’s no follow through. A ball dropped once or twice is understandable. Commitments continually broken send undeniable signals that we’re either too busy, over committed, can’t manage our schedules, or perhaps even don’t care. None of these are the trademarks we’re shooting for as leaders.

Do you see yourself in this post? Are you ready to be a more reliable leader?

  • Apologize if you’ve been the offender. Fortunately, most people have more grace than we give them credit for.
  • Commit to a process that helps you follow through. Technology and resources are rife. Use them. Ask others who are successful at follow through to learn their best kept secrets.
  • Start over. Change your story. Instead of saying, “I’m bad about following up”, tell yourself, “I honor my word.”  Reinvent how you show up as a respected leader and person.

Just DWYSYWD.

Creativity – It’s Everyone’s Business

Posted on March 6, 2018

In a recent blog, I shared a list of competencies required for today’s leaders in growth organizations. One of the most favored – yet most often misunderstood – is creativity.

“But, I’m just not creative” emerges from the mouth of many leaders when the topic comes on the table. Many times it’s someone from finance or accounting! “You know what happened when those finance folks at certain failed organizations got too creative…,” they say.  True.

Healthy Creativity

Healthy creativity in businessHowever, healthy creativity, can unfold in many ways in any functional area. Most everyone can unleash this skill when they allow themselves the opportunity.

Recently in Harvard Business Review, Tom Perrault, the Chief People Officer of Rally Health, made a compelling case for a liberal arts degree and the potential strengths it develops – not just technical skills – because he claims the strengths developed in this degree are the ones that hold the keys to a company’s future success. And guess what skill is at the top of the list? Creativity.

Why are these “softer skills” like creativity getting more valuable? Because the ability to tell clear stories and design user friendly products and services is becoming more critical for all companies. Perrault describes the imperative of creativity this way, “When it comes to creating tech products, simplicity is hard,” writes Perrault. “Only people with specialized creative skills  –honed from years of thinking, reading, writing, and creating — have the talent of making the complex simple and the difficult accessible.”

How to Approach Creativity

When we work with leaders, we approach creativity from two vantage points:

1-    The traditional definition – What ideas can be birthed from conceptualization into reality?  To help with this process, we encourage them to consistently ask questions and complete thoughts such as:

·  “If only we had…”

·  “Work would be easier if I could…”

·  “Our clients need to solve…”

Setting aside time to come up with these answers can yield new product and service ideas that could never be incubated in the typical “stay busy”, reactive mode.  Allocating blocks on the calendar for personal think time and/or group brainstorming or mind mapping activities holds the secret to engaging in fruitful ideation.

2-    The process improvement definition – What is currently in existence that needs to be improved? In the one client’s sandbox, it’s called SMARTER. BETTER. FASTER. Some of the practices and questions that can be asked to yield the best improvements are:

·  Why did we start this practice/create this product in the first place?

·  Is it still necessary? If it is still necessary, is there a better way to reach the same result?

·  What are the consequences of continuing to do it this way?

·  What is stopping us from doing it differently?

Why is creativity misunderstood? Because most think of creativity as building from ground zero intervention. Using the broader definition and looking at it through two lenses, means that all of us can come up with ideas that could be game changers. Creativity is a learnable skill. Some of us come to the table with higher doses, yet we all have it to some degree.

Find Your Creative Place

In the coming weeks as you are focused on creating, look for your “creative place.” What and where is it?  Is it a time of the day? A certain physical place? Most meaningful alone or with others? One leader I work with has a white board in his shower that is humidity resistant. That’s his best time and place for thinking. He showers every day, so it happens. That’s getting creative – in how you work on creativity!

Allowing ourselves to be creative yields many advantages. Not only does it impact company efficiency, revenue and/or profitability, it creates more personal energy.  And we can all use a bigger dose of that.

You are creative.

All You Need Is…Love?

Posted on February 14, 2018

In the month of February, the theme of love is rampant. On the retail front, we are surrounded by red and pink hearts, cupids with arrows and the nudge to carve out and celebrate a day just for love. This day of passion applies to many of us on the personal front as we proclaim our love for anyone close – a spouse, a significant other, as well as a family member or friend. Hallmark® has all of the bases covered.

Does love also apply professionally? How important is this emotion of love as it relates to leadership?

John Wooden, winning basketball coaching legend said, “Love is the most powerful thing there is.” In winning 10 NCAA titles, he applied what he repeatedly called the two most important elements of his success in coaching and in life: 1- love; and, 2- balance.

Is it really that simple? Over the years we’ve held several focus groups to find out what leaders really need in order to be high performing; and in particular, leaders within pre-rapid growth organizations. Here’s what we’ve learned is imperative:

Creativity and Risk-Taking – Leaders need to incubate new ideas and think in different ways to be able to avoid organizational and product maturation.  The love of, at least tolerance of risk is a key in order to execute on those new ideas.

Teamwork and Collaboration – Trust, the ability to manage conflict, commitment, and accountability are all required to drive the desired results. There’s also a recognition that no one person has to be the rock star on the team.   And, let’s get real, in order to make any of these work optimally, it helps to at least like each other.

Delegation and Developing Others – Letting go when we love certain projects or tasks is hard. We have to realize that holding on prevents us and the team member from growing to their best and brightest place.

Strategic Thinking and Agility – Nimbleness is not an option in a dynamic, rapid changing environment. The ability to think beyond day to day, get into the broader mindset and act quickly is tantamount.

Executive Presence – Showing up with the emotional intelligence to lead by example and being counted as someone worthy of following is embodied in this competency.

As we continue our work, these same areas keep surfacing. Even though the word “love” didn’t play out as a finalist, in our research the word has been used repeatedly within this realm: “I love my job.” “I love my team.” “I love knowing we did the right thing.”

John Wooden was a wise man and role model. He knew about the importance of love as a leader. He summed it up best, “Your players must know that you care for them more than just as athletes. Certainly, they understand that they are there because of their athletic ability – that’s why they’re there. That’s paying their way .… it’s up to you to make sure that they understand that you care for them as individuals.”

Just. One. Word.

Posted on January 3, 2018

What’s the power of a single word? Just one word? If you could only pick a single word to guide your thoughts and actions for this year, what would it be?

One Word vs ResolutionsAt the beginning of each year, many feel internal and/or external pressure to make the traditional New Year’s resolutions. Those arguing resolutions are too esoteric may pen more measurable and realistic aspirations, or goals. Some opt out of the ritual altogether. Whatever camp you’re in, let me suggest changing up or even expanding upon your approach for this year.

Why Just One Word?

For the past decade, I’ve chosen one word as “the word of the year.” Since 1915, Webster has selected a word of the year. In 2014, Gordon, Britton and Page wrote a book on the concept called, THE ONE WORD THAT WILL CHANGE YOUR LIFE. This was followed by Ashcraft and Olsen in 2016 with their version of the concept in the book, MY ONE WORD. In 2015, instead of selecting a word for the year, Wikipedia chose an emoticon/pictograph of the year. A sure sign of the times.

I can’t tell you how this idea started for me – only that it’s worked brilliantly in providing focus on what’s important and in guiding choices. I can argue it’s been at least game-changing and defining for me as I reflect on my list of words selected.

One Word Examples

The year I needed to make a major life decision, my word was CHOICES. For perhaps the first time ever, I realized I had a choice in that situation. It was transforming. The next year, my word was ADVENTURE. At the tender age of 47, I started swimming, biking and running, and learned about my love for triathlons. In another year, the word was ABUNDANCE. Everything I needed, and even some things I wanted, found me. In a recent year my word was GRATITUDE – for my family and husband, my health, and the gift of rising every day to live life doing what I love. A couple of years ago the word was SIMPLIFY – my kids were all out of the nest, so I decluttered and made things as simple as possible.

My One Word for  2018

One Word - meaningfulThis year my word is MEaningful. As I turn 55, I don’t want to waste any more time on situations or issues that don’t bear significance and true meaning for what’s important to ME. The freedom to decide where I do and don’t invest my time feels liberating as a new chapter will be written this year. Since time is an “appreciable asset,” it is increasingly becoming one of my most important.

What’s your word for 2018? Email it to me at [email protected] Remember, it’s Just. One. Word. And it could be your game-changer this year.

The Conundrum of Culture

Posted on December 12, 2017

company culture word cloudAs we read most any business publication, watch TEDTALKS, or listen to podcasts, it’s crystal clear the topic of company culture has moved to front and center in the past few years.

Since 2010, culture has become the most discussed talent issue, having risen topically by 12% annually in earnings calls (Gartner, 2017). Organizations are increasingly becoming acutely aware their reputation and brand often hinge on culture. David Cummings, Co-Founder of Pardo claims, “Corporate culture is the only sustainable competitive advantage that’s completely within the control of the entrepreneur.”

In a recent client strategy meeting, the financial gaps between current and future EBITDA were exposed relative to the desired growth curve. A portion of the day was allocated to discussing potential revenue streams to bridge the gap and feed the continued growth aspirations. It was energizing and opportunistic to see several viable ideas poured out with such passion.

While companies must obviously keep their eyes on the prize of financials, we can argue that culture – while it may not ever become the leading star of the show – is going to increasingly steal a great deal of the spotlight.

Simply put, culture is about how we show up at work and how we get stuff accomplished. Or in the words of Brian Chesky, Founder of Airbnb, “Culture is simply a way of doing something with a passion.”

Company Culture Gap Analysis

So, what’s the conundrum with culture? Unlike financial gap analysis, organizations may overlook addressing cultural gap analysis. We can’t just “choose” culture. However, we can work to get team members to demonstrate the behaviors that epitomize the desired culture. In a 2017 study by Brooks and Knight, they looked behind the culture curtain of 7500 companies. Their work revealed three states of behavior tied to culture. The findings give us strong clues about the gaps between each one:

1-     What we say – Leaders communicate the importance of culture – 83% of leaders do this consistently;

2-     What we do – Leaders’ behaviors are consistent with culture – 29% landed here; and,

3-     How we operate – Culture is tied it into all processes – budgets, staffing, structure, policies – only 19% of employees drive culture to the operational level.

company cultureTo honor the integrity of culture, we must all walk the talk, as the old saying goes. It’s not only what we claim about culture, it’s about what we do at the inner-most tactical levels of the organization – whether it’s driving financials or any other metrics by which we define and measure success.

The study urges companies to remove the translation barrier for their team and themselves to ease tension. For example, if we have a different schedule for summer work hours as part of the bigger push toward work/life balance, does that mean we should leave at 3:00 to go spend time with our families, or work on the one critical project we’re trying to finish? The Gates Foundation has their teams define a framework of dos and don’ts for each core value aligned with the vision of how their team operates, allowing them to perform within any unique aspects of structure while preserving the overarching values. It also serves as a decision-making mechanism for high stakes moments of tension that may test alignment of culture.

Many organizations unquestionably have an enviable culture. However, with growth and scalability, it will become more critical for the culture to be further defined and actualized. This will mean bridging gaps between what is said and day-to-day moments of executional truth. It can be an opportunity to follow the philosophy of Nike as stated by Mark Parker, CEO, “We have a culture where are incredibly self-critical, we don’t get comfortable with our success.”

This can be the start in solving any challenge – even the conundrum of culture.

The Dance of Grace

Posted on December 5, 2017

It’s often a rarity, yet needed abundantly.  The word isn’t uttered in the board room, yet if the principle were applied, it could transform the organization. It starts with one thought, one act, and one person. If everyone practiced it, conflict would be more tolerable, forgiveness would come sooner, and peace would rule.

Am I in “la la” land?  No, I’m confident I’m onto something that’s as old as the creation of man, but often forgotten. It’s that one act we all need to give and receive more of – grace.

What is Grace?

Depending upon whom you ask it can vary slightly. After reading the Christian, Islam and Buddhist definitions, the meaning of grace boils down to one theme – “unmerited favor.” It’s getting the break we really don’t deserve. It’s meaning it and not just a habit when we say things like, “No problem” or “No worries.”  It’s NOT a problem or a worry because we get that we are one small move away from taking a misstep ourselves at any given time. It’s a couple of tiers above empathy, an absolute pre-requisite to forgiveness and one chess move away from mercy.

The tragedy is not only do we hide and hoard it from others, we rob ourselves of it as well – which is where it needs to start. Only when we are gracious to ourselves, can we understand what it means to show grace to others.

Why Grace?

Why has this principle chased me for the past few months?  What’s shown up for me as a Mom, friend, neighbor, athlete, but especially as a business owner and coach that has pursued me relentlessly to write about this rarity in behavior?

Well, I’ve had to learn to cut myself some grace.  I’ve made a decision or two lately that I regret.  The choice? Forgive or not forgive. Before I could do that, I discovered, I had to first dish up some grace to myself before I could begin to forgive.

Business Case Studies in Grace

This personal challenge has been accentuated by some case studies in business. I have recently studied how both the imparting and the deprivation of grace have played out diametrically in a couple of organizations.

Well Done - Grace at WorkIn one firm, this act is believed in and passionately embraced and lived out by the top leader. He epitomizes grace and embraces the concept with most every action. How does it show up? By giving everyone the benefit of the doubt, by believing at his core his team wants to do their best, and that their mistakes are a blessing and necessity in improving their climb toward more personal and organizational growth. He is vulnerable and transparent, humbly admitting his own mistakes first, and confessing when he doesn’t have the answer.  He seems to be forever grateful, positive and kind. Everyone who knows him professes his essence as true, unadulterated leadership at the core.

In another organization, a top leader is typically cynical, untrusting and doesn’t believe or at least profess the belief that everyone is genuinely giving their best. So, consequently, he doesn’t give praise for success or failure. Instead of focusing on improving himself, he is more purposed at improving others. There is mistrust, doubt and constant micromanagement.  The tether from action to consequence is short and often fierce.  This organization is driven by fear, and the former driven by desire.  Big difference.

Live from Grace – in Life and at Work

Grace at workWhat have I concluded? Grace is not reserved for spiritual contextualization only. It is meant to be in the trenches with us every day – in life and at work. To truly honor ourselves and others we have to live from grace. It’s an ongoing act that needs to show up over and over again. Show me a top leader that practices grace, and I’ll show you the healthiest of organizational cultures with thriving leaders and team members, loyalty of all stakeholders as well as long term and sustainable financial results.

Where does grace start?

1-     Believe that you and everyone else is worthy of understanding and receiving it;

2-     Be certain that everyone is doing or at least wants to do their best based on the gifts and tools they have been given; and,

3-     Practice intrigue. If we operate from a position of being intrigued and simply curious about the person or his performance, we can only have a positive position and the curiosity to learn more.

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